Bazaar Life Lessons (8/24/12)

Yesterday I learned that I could be Russian, or from Texas, or (with the help of tea or lemon salt) thinner or younger.  I also learned that Iranian fish eggs are sold in wax pods that look like big peppers and live leaches are still used for medicinal purposes in Istanbul.  Finally, I learned that stuffed apricots are stuffed with nuts not cheese (at least not until my sister moves to Istanbul to launch her cheese-stuffed apricots business).

The Spice Bazaar in Istanbul is full of life lessons (not to mention amazing spices).

Seriously, We Have a Palace (8/23/12)

Last night after a very fun but exhausting day of navigating the Grand Bazaar in Istanbul, my sister and I were feeling like a big night on the town would be a little too much.  So we opted for dinner just up the street from our hotel at a place called Albura Kathisma.  After a very good meal, we were getting ready to leave when our waiter said to us, "have you seen our palace?"

When  looked at him skeptically he said, "seriously, we have a palace.  Come see."

My sister and I followed our waiter down a passage in the wall to find the ancient remains of an actual palace.  It is the Byzantine Magnaura Palace to be precise and it was discovered as construction was beginning for a new hotel.  The hotel was never built and four rooms of the palace were excavated deep below the street.

The palace used to play host to foreign dignitaries and, according to our waiter, was once connected to Topkapi Palace.  According to hipstanbul.com the Kremlin Palace and San Marco Basilica were both inspired by Magnaura Palace.

For my sister and I it was an archaeological dessert that was deliciously enjoyed!

Circumcision Ouchfit (8/22/12)

As I've been walking around Istanbul this week I've noticed easily a dozen young boys dressed in all white suits with feather-trimmed capes, maces and hats.  These outfits are often trimmed in gold or silver.  They look like a cross between the Beatles' Sargent Peppers costumes, Liberace, and what I imagine St. Peter wears to welcome people at the Pearly Gates.

While at dinner last night I asked my friends who live in Turkey why so many boys were all dressed up.  My friend casually told me that they were circumcision outfits.  Muslim boys are not circumcised until they are between the ages of 7-10 (though some boys looked as young as 5).  After consulting various sites on the Web I also learned that the circumcision represents the transition from childhood to adulthood.  The boys notonly get a sweet white outfit, they also get gifts from family and friends at a big party held in their honor.

I guess it's similar to a bar mitzvah in Jewish culture, except a bar mitzvah doesn't include a little snip snip before the party can start.

It's the Thought That Counts, Mahmud (8/21/12)

We visited Topkapi Saray yesterday, the palace of the Ottoman Empire.  It's an impressive display of wealth and power from the gardens and Sultan's robes to the ornate jewelry and jewel-encrusted treasures.

One of the treasures of Topkapi is the dagger of Topkapi.  This gold and jeweled dagger has three huge emeralds on the handle. It was originally meant as a gift from the Sultan Mahud I to Nadir Shah, the Iranian conquerer, but as the delivery entrouge made its way from Constantinople to Iran they received word that Nadir Shah had been killed.  So they returned back from whence they came and the dagger remained at Topkapi.

In the late 1960's a movie called Topkapi was released starring Peter Ustinov.  This movie is about a group of people trying to steal the dagger of Topkapi.  This movie is so going into my Netflix cue!

Monkey Marriage in Istanbul (8/20/12)

Yesterday I was sitting on a rooftop in Istanbul with my sister and my friend Celex.  Though it was sunny it started to drizzle rain.  Celex told us that in India when it is both sunny and raining they say monkeys are getting married.  Monkeys getting married...how cool is that?!?  Yesterday they were getting hitched in Istanbul (not Constantinople).

Third time's the charm for Mother Nature in Greece (8/19/12)

Yesterday I visited Akrotiri which I learned is the Greek Pompeii.  Located on Santorini, right near the red beach, Akrotiri was once a thriving metropolis of cosmopolitain culture.  Despite being a very prosperous village as evidenced by some large houses with distinct signs of wealth, the people of Akrotiri had some challenges.  They suffered through an earthquake that destroyed part of the town.  They rebuilt and continued to prosper until they were hit by a second earthquake. Not cool, right?  But wait, there's more.  While still rebuilding from the second earthquake (and this way in the 17th century B.C. so rebuilding was hard work)  the down was destroyed when it was engulfed in ash and lava from a volcano.

Archeologists have been working for decades on the excavation of Akrotiri.  They've found signs of regulated commerce, advanced amenities for homes, including an indoor toilet, and imports from other parts of the world - my favorite being monkeys.

Unlike Pompeii, the residents of Akrotiri were able to escape before being buried - possibly because they were a port city, possibly because they had already experienced two disasters and were on their game.  Maybe they were finally just lucky.

Red, White and Black (8/18/12)

Yesterday I learned about the black, red and white beaches of Santorini.  Three of the most popular beaches for tourists and locals alike these beaches provide three different experience of Greek paradise.

The white beach is the most secluded of the three.  It is accessible only by boat, with small ferries running there several times a day.

The red beach is so named for the red colored cliffs that climb skyward from it.  The red beach is fairly secluded and requires visitors to climb a steep, rocky path to reach it.  This climb deters few as it is a very popular destination.

Finally the black beach gets its name from the black sand of its beaches.  This sand is a result of the volcanic eruption thousands of years ago and is a stark contrast to the bright blue water.

All three provide visitors with an amazing beach-going experience that won't soon be forgotten.

White and Blue Pride (8/17/12)

Sailing towards Santorini it is hard to not be struck by its beauty. Rocky cliffs striped with history meet some of the bluest waters one will ever see. Dotting these cliffs are the white churches with the blue domes, know the world over as a symbol of Greece.

A few days ago I learned about why the buildings were white and that nearly every family has a church. But it wasn't until yesterday that I learned why the domes are that beautiful, distinctive blue.  According to the captain of our sailboat, the blue domes were a subversive showing of national pride.

The Greeks are no strangers to wars. They have battled the Persians, the Turks, and the Venetians among others. It was during the occupation by the Venetians in the 13th century that Greeks were ordered to no longer fly the Greek flag. Being a people of great national pride and a good deal of smarts, the Greeks chose to paint their churches white with brilliant blue domes to match the colors of their flag.  The churches being Greek Orthodox were already a strong symbol of the culture of Greece, so they were a fitting vehicle with which to assert their independence, however small.

Today, much like the whitewash on the buildings, the domes are kept blue out of tradition. When you see them you are touched by the tradition of Greece and its independen

Back to WiFi Reality

As I am sitting here fighting off the vacation blues, I can take solice in the return of reliable wireless service.  And with that, a backlog of posts are coming your way from the past week.  Enjoy!

The Wrath and Beauty of Mother Nature

Santorini is one of the most popular islands in Greece.  Located in the Agean Sea southeast of mainland Greece, Santorini is a remnant of a huge volcanic explosion some 3600 years ago.  This eruption destroyed all of the settlements previously located on the once singular island.  According to the captain of our boat, many scholars believe that the explosion engulfed and sunk the island into the sea - thus creating the lost city of Atlantis.  The explosion also created a 700 foot high tsunami that wiped out the entire Minoan civilization on the island of Crete.

The huge caldera left behind is filled with water to depths of 400m preventing all but only the largest cruis ships from docking in the bay.  Many towns throughout Santorini look down on the caldera, a beautiful reminder of the power of Mother Nature.

Mark Your Calendar

Yesterday I learned about another huge music festival - Exit Festival.  It takes place every July in the Petrovaradin Fortress on the Danube River in Novi Stad, Serbia.  This four day festival brings artists from all over the world for a huge outdoor party (Duran Duran and Guns N Roses headlined this year).  What makes this one different from other festivals is that there are performances all night until dawn across 16 stages, according to my new friend Sasha, who is originally from Novi Stad.

So mark your calendars for next July and maybe I'll see you in Serbia!

Jaws vs. Flipper

Yesterday I set off for a few days of sailing around the islands of Greece.  While enjoying a nice afternoon of leisurely sailing (i.e. me enjoying a nice leisurely afternoon while someone else sails the boat) I learned two very interesting new things.

The first is that there is 3G service out in the middle of the Agean Sea.  Seriously, who knew?  I guess the Greeks did, but it was still news to me, and made the prospect of actually sharing my learnings in a timely fashion a pretty good bet.  We'll see what happens tomorrow, though.

The second thing that I learned is that a school of dolphins can beat the snot out of a Great White shark.  According to our captain, the dolphins will use their noses (or are they snouts?  I'm not sure) to repeatedly bludgeon a shark to death.  Because of this vicious mob attack, Great White sharks no longer swim in the Agean Sea.

And, really, can you blame them?  Think of the embarrassment of getting your fin kicked by the world's cutest marine mammal.  That would be like getting your butt kicked by Justin Bieber, although the dolphins would actually hurt you.

Nice work, dolphins.  Keep on keeping the sea clear of giant things that might want to eat me.

A Few Extra Men (and Women)

Yesterday was the last day of the 2012 Summer Olympics.  By all accounts they were successful, if very expensive games.  Last night as I took a taxi from the waterfront in Mykonos back to the hotel, we chatted with the driver about what else, but the Olympics.  We were talking about medal count and the expected dominance of the powerhouses, China and the US.  One  of my friends said that Great Britain had done well in the medal count, to which our taxi driver commented, "they should, they have so many athletes.  Too many."

The driver then told us that host countries get more athletes than they normally would in any other year.  I would guess that is to make sure that the host country is well represented.  i said that I did not know that, and he said this was definitely the case for Greece in 2004.

"Greece had a baseball team," he said emphatically.  He then went on to tell us that he had watched just to see if they even knew how to play the game.  "They did pretty good," he said.  He then added, "I looked and all of the players were brought back from America."

And so goes the Olympics.  At least there were super models at the closing ceremonies.

Saints in White

Mykonos is an absolutely beautiful Greek island in the Agean Sea.  The first two thing you notice (after the stunningly blue sea) are the buildings and the large number of churches.  On a tour yesterday, my tour guide shared some interesting facts about both.

The cliffs and harbors of Mykonos are littered with gleaming white buildings, most of which are trimmed in blue and only a few stories high at most.  This is the traditional architecture of Mykonos, that dates back centuries, and is now required for all buildings on the island.  This signature look of the Greek Islands was born out of necessity rather than vanity.

In times past, many Mykonians were sailors.  To help protect them and ensure safe return from the sea, most families built private churches where they could pray.  These family owned Greek Orthodox Churches were usually located next to or near the family home, and were dedicated to one of the patron saints.  Popular choices were St. Nicholas, patron saint of sailors; the Virgin Mary, patron saint of the island; and St. George, patron saint of soldiers.  There are over 1000 of these churches on Mykonos, and though still used for prayers regularly, mass is usually only said on the feast of the saint for which the church is named (which means on the feasts of St. George and St. Nicholas, the priests are really, really busy).

The white walls of the buildings on Mykonos also served a very specific purpose years ago.  Prior to the advent of modern medicine, plagues were a frequent occurrence and a constant concern.  To help keep their families safe and healthy, Mykonians would paint their houses with lime several times a year, since lime kills bacteria.  The lime was made by taking marble from nearby Delos island (the former commerce hub of the area) and burning it until it turned to lime.  This could then be painted onto buildings disinfecting them while at the same time giving them that beautiful while look.

The oldest church on Mykonos (below) combines the two best known attributes of Mykosos beautifully!

Just a note:  being in a completely different time zone and having limited internet access might mean that more than one post will appear on some days on none on others, but I promise (I really, really do) that I am being faithful to my pledge and each post represents one day of previous learning.  So there!

Fear of the Ancient Greek Social Scene?

Agoraphobia, according to Merriam-Websters Dictionary is an "abnormal fear of being helpless in an embarrassing or  unescapable  situation that is characterized especially by the avoidance of open or public places."  Yesterday I saw first hand why that phrase exists.

As part of my trip to Greece we spent the day in Athens where we climbed to the top of the Acropolis.  Along with the Acropolis being being amazingly beautiful and impressive, the view of Athens from the Acropolis was breathtaking.

One of the ruins I could see below the Acropolis was a long temple.  Our tour guide informed us that the ruins were of the Agora.  The Agora, back in the centuries leading up to the shift from AD to BC, was the market where people would congregate to purchase food and other goods.  It was also the site where athletic contests were held and where friends came to gossip or discuss politics.  It was the place to see and be seen in Athens.

Because of all of this activity, people packed in the the Agora on a daily basis.  On any given day there could be thousands and thousands of people packed into the Agora working and socializing together.  People who were uncomfortable being trapped any type of social setting would have been extremely afraid of the Agora - hence the term agoraphobia.

Rock On, Greece

I arrived yesterday in Greece. a county I have never visited before. We had transportation arranged to take us to our hotel, and to be perfectly honest I was planning on napping during the 40 minute ride.   I was, after all,  pretty tired from our 15 hours of travel, and  usually the ride from the airport into any city is not the most scenic.

Our driver was incredibly friendly, and clearly proud of Athens.  As soon as we drove out of the airport he started to share interesting facts about Greece.  The one I really remembered is that 80% of Greece is mountainous.  

Driving into Athens you certainly see signs of this.  Athens is bordered by three different mountain ranges, and has 7 hills, which are really small mountains.    In looking on the web for information about the mountains in Greece I came across a very interesting legend, courtesy of the website Random Facts. 

Legend has it that "when God created the world, he sifted all of the soil onto the earth through a strainer.  After every country had good soil, he tossed the stones left in the strainer over his shoulder and created Greece."  I find this legend somewhat hard to believe, because those "stones" are some of the most beautiful marble in the world, which was used to build most of ancient Greece.  

While God may have sifted the soil onto the earth, like the archeologists all over Athens, he may have been looking for the most valuable bits of the soil, which he saved to form Greece.  Something this beautiful must have been intentional.

Swiss Miss?

Yesterday I was on a Swiss Air flight.  At least I think it was yesterday.  I'm still not quite sure what time zone I am in.  For the purposes of this post, let's just say it was yesterday.  While on the flight, the flight attendants came through with the duty free cart.  A chance to purchase an assortment of different items, tax free right on the plane.  Convenient if you were looking to pick something up, but didn't have time to stop at the duty free shop at the airport.  

As the flight attendants pushed the carts through the cabin, one of them announced the cart by saying, "Cigarettes, chocolate, watches."  At first I was struck by the strangeness of that list.  Cigarettes and chocolate I could see - both are usually sold at gas stations and mini marts.  But watches?!?  As I started to mull this over in my head, I was struck by an even greater oddity.  Swiss Air was selling cigarettes on an airplane!

For years now it has been illegal to smoke on planes.  There is a message included in the safety review at the start of the flight warning passengers that it is a no smoking flight.  There are alarms in the lavatories should any smokers be foolish enough to try secretly smoking.  And it is a felony to tamper with or try to disable those smoke detectors.  

Now, I am not a smoker.  I have never even tried a cigarette.  I do know smokers, and many of them have a hard time going for four hours without a cigarette. This flight is eight hours, twice that time, so any serious smokers would definitely be wishing for a cigarette before the flight is over.  It seems mean to me to tempt those individuals with a cart littered with cartons of cigarettes (not to mention chocolate and watches) less than halfway through the flight.

So I guess I learned today that Swiss Air is insensitive to the cravings of serious smokers.  Sure, that's my opinion, but all facts seem to support it.  And even if they are sensitive, that doesn't change the ridiculousness of selling those cigarettes along side chocolate and watches.

Good luck with that, Swiss Air.

World's Largest Lite Brite

Yesterday I learned what it is like to be part of the world’s largest Lite Brite.  Do you remember Lite Brite?  One of two toys I had growing up that derived their main source of entertainment from a light bulb.

The first was the Easy Bake Oven.  You put a small pan of brownies or cake batter into the plastic box and the light bulb would magically cook the batter, yielding actual brownies or a cake that you could share with friends (well, maybe one friend.  The pan was pretty small).  It was amazing, borderline magical!  As a kid I was fascinated by the idea that a light bulb could bake a cake.  As I got older I was amazed that I was allowed to play with something hot enough to bake a cake!  As cool as it was, The Easy Bake Oven was really more of a special occasion toy.

Lite Brite, on the other hand, was an everyday toy of the best variety.  It allowed for creativity and it plugged in, which meant something electronically cool.  I spent hours and hours plugging the little pegs into the black paper on the light up board making all sorts of things - pictures, designs, signs.  Sometimes I would just fill up the whole board with pegs creating a lighted mosaic of jewel tones that to me was just so beautiful.

Last night I was reminded of the beauty of Lite Brite when I went to the Coldplay concert.  As we walked into the arena, each person was given a bracelet to wear that looked like this:

As the lights went down at the start of the show, the straps of these bracelets began to light up.  Every person in the United Center was turned into a human Lite Brite peg and the result was just as beautiful as those original designs I made when I was a kid.  Throughout the show the bracelets were timed to light up with the music so that there was this amazing pulsing and sparkling of beautiful colored lights engulfing the concert.  Below is a view of the whole stadium as Coldplay performed “Charlie Brown” to delight the crowd.

Yesterday I learned what it is like to be part of the world’s largest Lite Brite, and it is awesome!

ATM - A Tasty Machine

We live in a convenience-focused world.  Need groceries at 2 am? No problem - there’s likely a 24 hour market nearby.  Short on cash?  Easy – there’s an ATM just up the street.  Spilled something on your best suit the day before your buddy's wedding? Fear not – there’s a same-day dry cleaners around the corner (and if you’re lucky they can get it done in an hour).  The world, or maybe just Chicago, is constantly trying to make our lives uber easy.  

No, I didn’t just learn that yesterday.  I did, however, learn about the latest convenience that has popped up in Chicago – a cupcake ATM.  That’s right, you can now make convenient cupcake withdrawals 24 hours a day, 7 days we week at Sprinkles Cupcakes in the Gold Coast.  How many times have you woken up in a cold sweat craving a cupcake only to realize that every bakery in town was closed for the night?  And how many times have you had to settle for a semi-stale Hostess cupcake because your favorite cupcake shop closes at 6pm on Sunday?  Yeah, those things haven’t happened to me either, but if they ever do, I will be able to overcome them by simply visiting the Sprinkles ATM. 

The Sprinkles Cupcake ATM holds 500 cupcakes.  Flavors are based on the daily assortment of cupcakes, and each cupcake costs $4.  Sorry, kids, it won’t do you any good to save your pennies in your piggy bank because the Sprinkles ATM only accepts plastic.  I suppose you could walk the extra 12 feet to the actual store and buy a cupcake with those pennies, but that’s so old school.

So if you are jonesing for some cupcakes in the middle of the night, or if you just prefer to get your cupcakes from a cold, impersonal machine rather than an actual human (and who doesn’t, especially in January) than the Sprinkles ATM is for you!  And if it is for you, well then you’d probably be interested to know that the ATM has its own Facebook page.

Enjoy

https://www.facebook.com/sprinkles#!/CupcakeATMChicago

American Animalier

Brunch is arguably one of the best ways to spend part of your Sunday morning.  In Chicago, one of the oldest, and still most popular places to go for breakfast is Lou Mitchell's.  It sits at the start of historic route 66 and there is nearly always a wait on Sundays.  Yesterday, while we were waiting for a table we picked up a trivia sheet provided by Lou Mitchell's where I learned something I never knew (even though I've lived in Chicago most of my life) - the lions outside of the Chicago Art Institute were sculpted by a dentist.

The question asked, "In 1984 Edward L. Kemeys, a dentist turned sculptor designed what to guard the entrance of the Chicago Art Institute?"  As I read this question to my friends, I stopped and said, "he was a dentist?!?  How cool is that?!?"  I've seen those lions hundreds of time, and have several pictures of myself next to them, but I never knew that they were designed by a dentist, even a former one.  What was Edward Kemeys' deal?

After quite a bit on online research I couldn't find any record that he was a dentist (though I'm sure he was if Lou Mitchell's says that  he was).  I did learn that he was the first American Animalier, according to the website www.bronze-gallery.com.  Kemeys was born in Georgia but moved to New York where he worked as an iron worker before the Civil War.  He fought in the war as a Captain of Artillery.  Following the end of the war he moved to Illinois where he tried to be a farmer.  It seems that he was a much better sculptor than farmer.  He worked on the construction of Central Park in New York, which is where he first studied animals.  This love of animals lead to a very successful art career.  He traveled the world to study animals and lived in Paris awhile to hone his art techniques.  Kemeys had a lot of critical success as a sculptor, with many commissions and over 25 sculptor displayed at World's Fairs.  He had a studio in Chicago, and his sculptures continue to inspire artists who work to depict animals.

He also, apparently, found time to fix some teeth.  Not bad, Edward.

Chicago Haze

Yesterday I was driving into downtown Chicago for day two of Lollapalooza.  One of my favorite views of my regular life is seeing the Chicago skyline in the distance as I drive down the Edens Expressway.  Yesterday, however, it looked like the city was engulfed in fog...serious fog...London-esque fog.  The problem was, it wasn't fog.  In fact it was 87 degrees out, which is hardly foggy weather.  It was one of the haziest days I had ever seen living in Chicago and it got me to wondering, what exactly makes the air so hazy on a given day.


I'm aware of ozone action days, and know that they are caused by high levels of ground ozone due to auto emissions, factory pollutants, and aerosol cans.  Ozone action days occur between May and October and are highest in the Midwest.  There have been several ozone action days recently, probably because it's between May and October here in the Midwest (crazy how that works), but the city has not been shrouded in haze.  What made yesterday different?  I checked several weather website, and of course Wikipedia to see what I could find.


It turns out that air quality can worsen when the pollutants build up because they are not diluted by fresh air.  When the air is stagnant, say from a lack of wind, the air pollution remains in the same area and this localization of the pollutants leads to haze.  


Judging by yesterday's haze, the pollutants were as crammed together as we were at the Red Hot Chili Peppers Lolla set.   However, since the rain had cleared the air in Chicago, the haze we were surrounded by at the concert last night was from a decidedly different type of pollutant.

Double Up, Boys. Double Up!

Yesterday was the first day of Lollapalooza, a three day music festival in Chicago.  Lolla, as it is regularly called for short is held outside in Grant Park.  While this is my third year going, I still managed to learn something, though it probably won’t ever make it into a textbook.

One of the challenges of any outdoor music festival is the bathroom situation.  Bathroom is really pretty generous, if I think about it, since they are just porta potties.  But there are a lot of them at Lolla and with all three days being sold out, they are getting a lot of use.  This means lines, and lines, and lines.

Last night we were waiting in line before the headliners were scheduled to start.  Obviously we were in a bit of a hurry (as were the other few thousand people waiting with us at that particular bank of porta potties).  As a joke, my friend Nancy told a couple of guys that they should double up to speed up the wait.  Now, before you get all grossed out, I would like to point out that port potties have both a toilet and a small urinal in them so this is not a ridiculous suggestion.  Men are also used to going to the bathroom somewhat together, especially if they have every used the trough system at Wrigley Field (so I have been told).  Really the only question was if there was enough room to actually double up.  

Two guys in front of Nancy were a little drunk and up for the challenge.  They doubled up, and they came out to cheers from everyone who appreciated their attempt to move the line faster.  Another pair of guys doubled up as well and they too were cheered upon exiting the porta potty.  It was catching on so quickly that a married couple decided to double up too.  The woman said that they had been together for so long that this really was no big deal.

So, my key take-away from yesterday is (and boys this is for you) if you want to make friends in a really long line for the porta potties, a sure fire way is to find a buddy and double up!

Now, today I hope to learn something non-bathroom related...

You GoGirl!

Next week I am going on vacation.  Since I’m a chronic over-packer, I was looking around on the web yesterday for tips on packing efficiently.  I stumbled across the site Packing Light (www.packinglight.net) where I learned about a very interesting (and by interesting I mean hilarious) travel product.

Under the “Ladies’ Travel Essentials” section I discovered the GoGirl Urinary Funnel. According to the site it is “a female urination device (sometimes called a FUD) that allows you to pee while standing up.”  A FUD, huh?  Hmm…tell me more.  The GoGirl is a funnel made from medical grade silicon that folds up into a 4 inch tube that can be, as the site points out, stored in a small purse.  It is easy to clean, has an “ergonomic fit” (which is so important in a urinary funnel) and it comes in either pink or camo green.  

The best part of the GoGirl is the instructions (shown below).  They inform the user on how best to hold the FUD, what happens if you apply too much pressure, and then provide a nice motivational tip that reads, and I quote:

Don’t get discouraged if you dribble the first time or two.  With a little practice GoGirl will work perfectly every time.

And really, aren’t we all just looking for a reliable FUD?  Well, actually no, but you GoGirl!

Grand Bargain? Call Me...Maybe

Before yesterday if someone had asked me what the Grand Bargain was, I probably would have said 75% off a pair of Cole Haan shoes – that’s a pretty big bargain and wearing them does make me feel grand.  Yesterday, however, I was listening to a panel discussion on healthcare reform and one of the participants referred to the Grand Bargain.  Since I am pretty sure that there is no legislative policy around a really great shoe sale (sadly) I knew it was once again time for some research.

According to Merriam-Webster.com a bargain is “an agreement between parties settling what each gives or receives in a transaction between them or what course of action or policy each pursues in respect to the other.”  Which naturally makes a grand bargain a really, really big agreement of this kind.  That might be oversimplifying things a bit, but you get the idea.

The specific grand bargain referred to yesterday was the one that President Obama and House Speaker Boener had hoped to agree on back in the summer of 2011 to deal with the budget and deficit crisis.  While I was aware of the ongoing negotiations to compromise on everything from tax cuts to Medicare I had never once heard it referred to as the grand bargain (and trust me, the word bargain always makes my ears prick up).

My research (extensively conducted via Google) turned up several other grand bargains references from the past few months.  Ryan Crocker, outgoing US Ambassador to Afghanistan said there would be no grand bargain with the Taliban.  Tony Blair noted that a grand bargain is needed to save the euro.  Sociologist Amitai Etzioni proposed a NATO-Russia grand bargain.  There were many other instances highlighting recent use of phrase from politicians and pundits the world over.

Which lead me to my personal conclusion that Grand Bargain is the hot political term of this summer.  It’s like “Call Me Maybe” - that one song that takes over the airwaves each summer- but of policy.  It’s so catchy and interesting at first, but then it is increasingly overplayed, until you find yourself reaching to turn to a different station on the radio.  And like the summer song, a grand bargain without much substance it will get tired, and be replaced by the next new fluffy, pop-policy term. 

Take notes policy makers (musical notes, that is).  The only way to turn Grand Bargain from “Call Me Maybe” to “Satisfaction” is to “Come Together” and “Agree to Agree.”  So, come on, “Why Can’t We Be Friends?”

Mitt's Inner Circle

Yesterday I learned (courtesy of WBBM New Radio) that I could download a free app that will allow me to be the first to know who Mitt Romney picks to be his Vice Presidential running mate.  Well, the second to know after his wife, Anne... or maybe the third to know after the candidate.  You know, it would probably be more like the 12th to know after the aids and vetting team... or maybe the 21st after the nominee's family and close friends who, of course, promise not to breathe a word to anyone.  Now that I think about it, I would probably the 107th to know after all of the Republican party heads and their staffers, not one of which would dare leak the information to the press.  Let's be honest, I would probably be the 20,917th person to know after all of the spouses, best friends, hair dressers, bus drivers and dog walkers who found out from the 107 other people ahead of me, and that's not counting all of their friends and family and book club members who have also secretly heard the news.

Yes, if I download the app, and give the Romney campaign my name, address, email address and access to the GPS tracker on my phone, I can be nearly the first person to know who Mitt Romney pics for a running mate.  Yep, me and every single reporter on the planet, all of whom will certainly sit on that information for at least a week to keep the country in suspense.  Wow, how could I ever pass up this fantastic opportunity to be in the Republican inner circle?

Thanks, Mitt.